Braindead Zine


	GRONIBARD "Satanic Tuning Club" Cd
	Release date: 2004 Running time: 32:03 Review: If you don't know Gronibard yet, they're the french response to Gut, only a whole lot dumber. This is actually probably the best (gore)grind band France has to offer with Sublime Cadaveric Decomposition and they're one of the funniest band ever too. The sound production is really astounding here, crystal clear, crushing and heavy as hell, the material is Gronibard at their best in my opinion, highly effective, basic riffs, smashing drumming, hysterically funny, wacky, kinda girly screams (or even mimicking a barking dog or a meawing cat in the opening song) and gore-drenched pitch-shifted growls... In fact, the vocals are very akin to Gut as is the music, this is just like Gut except much faster, more energic and blasting all the way! Lyrics are total sleaze, stupid porn humor with songs written mostly about sodomy; intros are often funny french dubbed dialogue off a few porn flicks, you're really missing alot if you don't speak french! A high point of this cd is the cover version of Disrupt's "A life's a life", needless to say the anti-vivisection message of the original goes down the drain and they even replaced the intro with... is it french-canadian porn? Not sure... Anyway, good time! I was expecting this cd to also contain the tracks off the "Split Your Guts" split cd but apparently, it doesn't... The unplugged songs in the end are amusing although a little tiring, still overall, this is high quality, awesome goregrind, highly recommended! MP3: "30 millions de zobis" Tracks: 1)30 millions de zobis 2)J'te lacère les tétons à coups de brosse à dents (sale pute) 3)Arrête de boire, mets toi au foutre 4)Ta gueule Cédric 5)Dans le fion à Hélène 6)T.A.F (tout à fond) 7)David Gay Tha 8)A life's a life (Disrupt cover) 9)Fais moi pas chier connasse 10)Fingernails (Exit13 cover) 11)March of the Gronibard / je te déchire l'anus (unplugged) 12)Prout de bite (unplugged) 13)Va faire la vaisselle (unplugged) 14)Pacifuck (force anus) (unplugged) Band Website: http://come.to/gronibard Label Website: http://www.bonesbrigaderecords.com/


	GRONIBARD Debut Full Length Cd
	(Bones Brigade) Running Time: 43:03 (...including about 10 minutes of blank space before the hidden final track...) Release date: 2001 Review: Let's see what Bones Brigade promo sheet tells us: Interviews and track sampler in major magazines: Hard Rock Magazine, RockHard, Hard n' Heavy... 5/6 in Metallian, Distributed in France through Adipocere, soon opening for Cannibal Corpse, Aborted, Impaled, Krisiun... Wow. And now they're FAMOUS, maybe they're gonna BANG some CHICKS? Whatever, color me impressed! They have such a great clean sound, I surely didn't expect that, because you know, I actually listened to the lot of their demos and split tapes I had to review, believe me that wasn't sounding like that at all. Now they're powerful Porn' Goregrind à la Gut, Mucupurulent, Purulent Spermcanal, Sublime Cadaveric Decomposition (is gay!)... They're as good as Cock and Ball Torture, except they're far more stupid, tasteless and wacky! There's this whole funny side to it you know, some really silly vocals, intros from the dumbest french porn films. The only thing I miss is the cartoon Inspector Gadget-like synthesiser parts, the album opens with one of those, but then, like, nothing! Too bad, I loved those. Anwyay, it's all a good laugh, awful, tasteless, cheap porn humour, but still a laugh. Although you definitely have to speak french to get it, some of the vocals are actually distinct, hopefully I don't have neighboors to ask questions anymore (I killed the lot of them). And how cool is their Gut "Cripple Bitch" cover? It's the best Gut cover I've heard, they almost sound like 'em. So, if you're not scared of silly humour that stains, big stinky Goregrind (moderately fast, like Gut) and you're still not convinced that frogs are the kings of Bad Taste even after Mental Degenration Unit, just check this out. On a final note, I wanna say thanks to Gronibard! It's like a reward to all of those who were able to stand your demos! and thanks to Bones Brigade for yet another masterpiece. You rule. Tracks: 1)March of the Gronibard (intro)/Je te déchire l'anus 2)http://www.j't'aspire le derche.com 3)Udufru (Belenos va en norvège) 5)Crème de chatte 6)Pomme d'anus 7)J'ai joué l'anus articiel de ton grand-père au PMU 9)Chérie, aurais-tu l'obligeance d'écarter les fesses? 10)Pacifuck (force anus) 11)J'ai fait des écouteurs pour mon walkman avec tes trompes 12)Cripple Bitch (GUT cover) 13)Sublime Cadaveric Decomposition is gay 14)Prout de bite 15)J'ai fait une salade de calamars avec des restes de circoncision de Cédric M (donc pas grand chose) 16)Détend ton prépuce avec un abat-jour, ça fera une parabole 17)Va faire la vaisselle 18)J'te chie à la gueule Foubert 19)Olé! 20)Morceau en son clair 21)Mon anus est un héliport à gland 22)The kill 23)Ma soeur a vu passer plus de queues que les caissières d'Auchan 24)Je te chie dans le cul avec un verrue plantaire sur l'anus 25)Mort fondu savoyarde 'Bélénos cover) 26)The bloody adventures of menstruator 27)J'ai gagné l'anus de ta tante à la kermesse du village 28)Viens là! Suce ma bite! 29)The sound of orange juice sloshing around you coffee (Last Days of Humanity cover) 30)Hémorrhoïdes bucco-dentaires 31)Mat est un connard 32)Il est pas carré, il est pas rond, il est ovale mon trou de balle 33)Fragments of corpse in my Bicky Burger Band Contact: Albatard@hotmail.com Necronembourg@hotmail.com Analcapone666@hotmail.com Website: http://come.to/gronibard Label Contact: BONES BRIGADE BP 31 62140 HESDIN FRANCE Email: bonesbrign@aol.com (Nicolas) Website: http://www.bonesbrigaderecords.com/